so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
