i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I have fence marks all over my body
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
