You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
