i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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