people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Randomize