whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
