she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Randomize
