My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Sorry about my life...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
