just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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