It's just like the Real World with babies
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
