The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
