Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
