Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
