we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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