what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
