The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
