sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
