marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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