I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I'm really busy with my period
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