How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
