Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
