I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
its not stalking. its research.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
