Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
