Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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