ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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