someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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