"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
