that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
