mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
