But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
