I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
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