first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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