ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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