hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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