Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
The adults are the big ones right?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
