I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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