if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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