Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
