i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize