his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
