Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Hippo gnu deer
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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