problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
you had me at cake vodka
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize