if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
