I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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