Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
