do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
