are you still at the devil's house?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize