i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
