Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Randomize
