Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
